There’s a fast-food restaurant not far from where we live. On nights when we were too tired or got home too late to cook, my husband would sometimes pick up takeaway from there. Time after time, the server would get our order wrong. It happened so frequently that we came to expect it, and it eventually became a running joke in our household.
If it hadn’t been for the sheer convenience of its location, we probably wouldn’t have kept going back.
Then, one night, my husband came home and, with mild surprise, reported that—for what felt like the first time—the restaurant had actually got our order right. What struck him most was that the staff member who served him appeared to have a hearing impairment; she was wearing hearing aids.
We couldn’t help but find it ironic that the one person you might assume would struggle most with hearing customer orders was the only one who had ever got ours exactly right. We wondered if, in fact, her hearing challenges made her a better listener—perhaps she had learned to focus more carefully, to confirm what she’d heard, and to avoid making assumptions. It stood in stark contrast to her colleagues, who, despite having no obvious impediments, consistently failed to listen properly or double-check the details.
It made us reflect on how valuable good listening really is. It’s a skill that’s essential not just for accurate service, but for meaningful communication in all kinds of relationships—personal and professional alike.
What is active listening? What does active listening look like?
Active listening has been described as “not only the number one leadership ability but also a tool that can unlock potential in every conversation, meeting, and decision.”[i]
Active listening is a skill that involves being intentional about seeking to understand not only the content of what someone is saying, but the meaning and intent behind their words. More than simply paying attention, it involves being fully present in the conversation, showing interest and listening to understand rather than to just respond. It means coming to a conversation with curiosity and respect, reflecting back what you’ve heard to check for understanding and to encourage the speaker to share more if they would like to.
They key to active listening is focussing on the other person rather than yourself. Paying attention to what your conversation partner is communicating (including non-verbally), instead of thinking about what you’re going to say next. Being willing to sit with their perspective, withholding judgment and advice.
The psychologist who coined the term, Carl Rogers said
‘Attentive listening means giving one’s total and undivided attention to the other person and tells the other that we are interested and concerned…. . We listen to the words of the other, but we also listen to the messages buried in the words. We listen to the voice, the appearance, and the body language of the other… We simply try to absorb everything the speaker is saying verbally and nonverbally
without adding, subtracting, or amending’.[ii]
Why is active listening important?
In a professional setting active listening is invaluable for collaborative work, and can even be a matter of safety where clear communication and correct understanding of important information is critical for avoiding errors.
Active listening is one of the top ‘soft skills’ sought by employers, due to the importance of effective communication in the workplace. Bosses need team members who can build and maintain professional relationships with colleagues, clients and stakeholders. Active listening can help us understand problems and get to the heart of complex issues. It enables us to comprehend the needs of others and be better at receiving and responding to feedback.
Active listening is also key for resolving conflicts as it creates space to hear and consider other viewpoints, and perhaps discern potential causes of friction.
Practicing active listening builds trust. It displays respect, patience, and empathy when we give someone our full attention and seek to truly understand what they’re communicating. It makes the speaker feel seen, heard and supported. These are all benefits of active listening in personal relationships and social situations also, helping to build and strengthen relationships and deepen bonds with others.
Active listening can also enlarge our world, broadening horizons by adding new knowledge and depth to our awareness of topics and perspectives. By approaching conversations with curiosity and without judgement, we invite a deeper understanding of the person we are listening to, and the world around us.
Miscommunication can be prevented when participants fully engage in conversation, avoiding distractions and checking for understanding. When we give our full attention we are more likely to not only absorb information accurately, but also to notice nuances beyond the content of what someone is saying. They may be communicating meanings behind the message, through non-verbal cues or perhaps by what is left unsaid. Asking follow-up questions, clarifying, and reflecting back to the speaker what you’ve understood all aid in ensuring the message received is indeed the message the speaker intended.
How to learn and practice active listening
Learn about the role of active listening and feedback in teams and unlock the power of communication to build stronger more connected teams with Speech Pathology Tasmania’s Professional Development workshops. Upskill with practical strategies that boost trust, collaboration and performance, with our training courses/workshops for organisations and individuals, such as Listening for Connection and Impact and Communication for Team Building. Explore our Professional Development Training Packages here.
[i] Gomes, K. Active Listening: The number one leadership ability that only a few truly understand. Medium, 18 Feb 2025.
[ii] Roberston, K. Active listening: More than just paying attention. Australian Family Physician Vol. 34, No. 12, December 2005